“Why, Your Majesty.”
“I came to fetch you since you hadn’t returned for a while.”
“Sorry, I found a good drinking partner after a long time.”
Cheryl glanced at me once and then briskly walked past me.
She must have gone to Magnus, who was standing behind, but I couldn’t bring myself to turn around.
Only when there was no one left in sight did I close my eyes tightly and calmly settle my remaining emotions.
“But you didn’t drink, did you?”
“You drink as much as you want and yet forbid me from drinking, that’s cruel. I can smell the alcohol on you.”
It was a blunt voice. He was brimming with vitality.
I felt relieved, yet at the same time, bitter. I felt so pathetic for having such dual emotions.
‘Which side is Illyana Glaine on?’
The soul is clearly someone else, so what are these emotions?
I couldn’t have fallen in love during that brief encounter.
“Oh, Your Majesty. This is Lady Glaine.”
Since I showed no sign of turning around, Cheryl introduced me, for whatever reason.
I wanted to shout that it was an unnecessary courtesy.
I barely checked my reflection in the glass, lowered my eyelids deeply, and slowly turned around.
Gracefully and with dignity. Lower my eyelids so my emotions don’t show, and my voice should be in a high tone, as she was described.
At least I must not let my agitation be noticed. Illyana Glaine smiled until the very end.
Even when her family’s limbs were severed and her life was being consumed, her expression didn’t change.
No matter what, I must not let him see my emotions.
“I am Illyana Glaine, Your Majesty.”
“Glaine…”
A low voice recited my surname. The steady and unwavering call sent shivers down my arms.
I was at a loss for words with this honest body. This body is completely insane.
“The only daughter of Marquis Glaine.”
“Yes, my apologies for the late introduction.”
I didn’t hear any command to raise my head.
I knew there was a gaze piercing the top of my head, but the silence was even more suffocating. I clenched my neatly folded hands in front of me.
Having Illyana Glaine’s body, I realized she wasn’t honest.
Illyana Glaine’s body was both honest and dishonest. Even though her insides were churning, she was so adept at wearing a mask.
‘How on earth…’
How did she live carrying such emotions? Her feelings for him were so heavy.
They were too heavy to be defined by a single word. Yet, how did she breathe and live so nonchalantly?
I felt like I was suffocating from her emotions. Even without facing him, I wasn’t confident I could hide my feelings when I did.
“If you’ve had your fun, let’s go. Cheryl.”
“Oh, okay. Are you sure?”
“What?”
“No, nothing. See you later, Lady Illyana.”
I couldn’t raise my head until the end. The Emperor, Magnus, didn’t allow her to raise her head.
I had to remain bowed until the two of them were out of sight.
And even after they disappeared, I couldn’t lift my head for a long time.
I wasn’t confident I could control the despair and sense of loss that would weigh down my shoulders the moment I raised my head.
Only after a long time passed could I straighten my back, as if a massive iron weight had been lifted.
*** *** *** *** ***
“Mag, is it really okay to leave her like that?”
“What do you mean?”
The dignified voice dissipated, replaced by a still youthful voice in response to Cheryl’s question.
Cheryl, who had been gazing at the smiling face, pointed to the terrace where Illyana was still bowing.
“Isn’t she the woman you wanted to find? Is it okay to treat her like that?”
“What do you mean by ‘treat her like that’?”
“I mean… not letting her raise her head, not speaking to her. Even when she’s under the influence…”
Cheryl lowered her voice significantly when mentioning that. She looked around diligently and then pressed herself close to Magnus, as if that wasn’t enough.
Since it wasn’t an unpleasant physical contact, Magnus let it be.
“I was wondering if she was the one you were so desperately looking for.”
“She is. I wondered where she was hiding, and here she appears.”
“…You’re something else.”
Cheryl shook her head. She was already surprised to find out the person she helped was a Prince, and now she found herself forcibly mingling at a party as a result of helping him.
“How did you find her among so many people? After you said you liked silver hair, it became a common hair color. You didn’t even know her eye color because she was wearing a mask.”
“Well…”
Magnus’s smile deepened. Cheryl recalled the pale beauty who had coldly brushed her off, looking at his shadowed lips.
Though her face had flushed from drinking and conversing, she was an overall pale beauty.
Every movement was graceful, and just the way her gaze moved captivated people.
Her voice was somewhat high-pitched, but her manner of speaking was very calm.
She was a ruler of a slightly different kind from Magnus. She resembled an evergreen tree that wouldn’t waver no matter what happened.
If faced with a choice before death, she would choose self-destruction over life.
“Cheryl, how could I not recognize her?”
“True. You said you went through a lot. Are you planning revenge? Honestly, from what I saw, she didn’t seem that bad…”
Cheryl hesitated with her words. There was no hostility during their conversation.
Though she led most of the conversation, except for when the atmosphere suddenly changed at the end, she appropriately agreed with Cheryl’s unnecessary and boring stories.
That’s why Cheryl described Illyana Glaine as a good drinking partner.
“She seemed to have changed a lot. She said she was at the temple academy. It’s really boring there, so if she was there for two years, her mindset might have changed a bit, right?”
“Temple academy?”
“Yeah. You know how boring it is there. She said she believes in God.”
Magnus’s face twisted at Cheryl’s words.
With a truly strange expression, Magnus blinked his long eyelashes once and then laughed.
“Oh dear… Soon that God will be shattered to pieces, and she’ll have nothing to lean on.”
“You’re not thinking of destroying the temple, are you?”
“You say the cutest and silliest things, Cheryl. It seems you only get the right answers in medicine.”
“Are you picking a fight, Your Majesty?”
Magnus burst into laughter at Cheryl’s cold voice.
Seeing him like this, Cheryl found it hard to adjust to the difference in temperature between Magnus in front of nobles and now.
“The only God a beast believes in is its master, Cheryl.”
“……”
It was a twisted statement spoken in a gentle voice.
‘She doesn’t seem easy to break, though.’
Illyana Glaine didn’t seem like someone who would easily crumble.
She didn’t bother to say anything.
No matter what happens, what Illyana Glaine did to Magnus wasn’t right.
‘Even if she tried to detoxify it later…’
What she did wasn’t right. Cheryl chose silence in response to Magnus’s cruel and twisted words.
“I’m contemplating.”
“Contemplating?”
“Yeah, I’ve never tried taming a clever fox before.”
Chapter 3
I was completely exhausted.
After the two of them disappeared, I practically ran back to the Moonlight Star. As soon as I arrived, I buried my face in the bed.
When I say I ran, I mean I moved quickly with an elegant gait.
Upon arriving at the castle, someone who looked like a butler greeted me with a bow.
I barely returned the greeting and collapsed in my room just now. I’m truly sorry, but I wanted to go home.
“To think I’d miss that sly old man.”
Rather than dealing with Magnus or Cheryl, it might be better to face Marquis Glaine, who was somewhat understanding due to my supposed memory loss.
Above all, I was mentally drained.
I had never properly understood the term ’emotional exhaustion,’ but today I understood it all too well.
I didn’t know how terrible it was to be unable to control one’s emotions. I felt like I had become Illyana Glaine, not myself.
“…I really hate this.”
Overwhelmed by the rising emotions, I irritably buried my face in the pillow.
‘I want to go home…’
Even though it’s an empty home and a world with nothing left, it would be better than here.
I preferred a world where I could be recognized for my efforts rather than desperately trying to stay unnoticed just to survive.
The feeling of the pillow getting damp made me even more miserable, and I couldn’t get up for a long time, buried in the pillow.
To be precise, I didn’t want to get up. I wished that when I closed my eyes and opened them again, I would be in my small room in the one-room apartment.
As I was thinking about this, I eventually dozed off.
…And the next morning, it wasn’t surprising to find a red-eyed, swollen fish in front of the mirror, much to my shock.
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